OMG...The First Doctor Visit!!!

Ok is it me or are Ryan and I totally underestimating every first with Bela!?! So today was Bela's first doctor visit. She had a fit in the car seat although we were expecting that because our first experience with the car seat was from the airport (but we were unprepared for that first tantrum too!). Luckily the Dr. was only a 5 minute drive. So while we waited at the Dr.'s office, Bela was having a good time with Ryan by playing with the toys and playhouse in the office. When we got into the Dr.'s office however, that was a WHOLE different story! She had pooped in her pants so bad it was riding up her back - of course mom didn't bring the diaper bag in the Dr's office and of course mom forgot to pack a change of clothes. The Dr. keeps diapers and stuff stocked so that helped but it was totally disgusting. She then threw a fit the entire time during the checkup. We had given her Dr. all of her medical records prior so she knew all the vaccinations that Bela had received already. However, she needed the nasal flu shot and then a shot on the arm for one other vaccination - we weren't prepared for her to get a shot! OMG!!!!!

When the worst was over, we then had to go down the street (another drive in the car seat) to draw blood. It took 3 people to hold her down to get her blood drawn!!! She threw such a fit that she bumped her head at the office on the counter. We could not wait to get the hec out of there and Bela pretty much stopped her fit as soon we started heading toward the elevators. Man - Ryan and I were wiped from the experience. Once Bela got home (after another fit in the car seat), she acted as if nothing had happened. She had lunch, started to joke around with Ryan (mom was still unloading the car and emptying the mess in the back seat) and she even pointed to her "owie" on her arm and gave an expression of how it hurt. Clearly we were more traumatized from the day’s events than she was! Now mom gets to follow Bela to the potty so she can collect 4 stool samples (yes, 4 different stool samples collected in 3 different jars each!)....the joys of motherhood never end! :) Seriously though, Bela is a resilient little girl and we're just so glad she is now back to "normal" now that we are home. She even learned how to give Ryan fist pound after she goes potty.

Bela is holding a wooden cat that seems to be like a lot. She points to Lucky when she is holding the cat but still is too afraid to pet our real cat. Oh well, at least she likes the fake cat.

Mommy's First Head Butt!

So right after my last post, it was dinner time for Bela. She got very fussy and head-butted me by accident in a fit of rage. I lost it (started crying) as it hurt so bad and I think I was just very frustrated. So there Ryan was consoling both me and Bela at the same time. When Bela saw me cry, she got very quiet and stoic again - almost remorseful for what had happened. She wouldn't even make eye contact with me. Needless to say, dinner was over that night. Bela woke up in the middle of the night and refused to go to sleep. What we figured out was that she was hungry and once she had a banana she was fine and went back to sleep. So yesterday we tried her on a different schedule.

After reviewing her schedule from the orphanage, it looked like she was eating much bigger meals here with us than she was used to. She was used to multiple smaller meals. Instead, she would have a big breakfast, a good sized lunch and we would then give her snacks before dinner - leading to small dinner and a middle of the night hunger craving. So we went without a nap yesterday and didnt have any snacks until about an hour before bed where we gave her warm milk and a banana (after a full dinner). She went to bed immediately and the times she woke up, she was just searching for Ryan and went right back to sleep once she saw him. So yesterday was a great day in our book - one of the best since we have been home. My sister and sister-in-law also came over and made some food for us since I was still pretty sick. It was nice to have some adult interaction again since it seems like we have been cooped up for weeks - even though it's only been 5 days.  So Bela is now sleeping with her butt stuck way up high with her belly button just a finger tip away. Today is her first Doctor's visit - let's hope the fits don't show up there!

2 Year old with a clean streak??

So Bela and Daddy managed to get some sleep last night. So much in fact that at 9am we had to wake little Bela up otherwise she could have slept for much longer. She also slept for 3 hours for her nap today also so our plan is to keep her up a bit later so she will sleep through the whole night. Hopefully this trial and error won't cause a major issue tonight. One thing is for sure, Bela is NOT a morning baby, but then again, not sure any baby is. It's odd however how clean Bela is. She insists on wiping herself after going potty, insists on picking up her crayons and blocks after she is done playing with them; she remembers which drawers had which books and puts them in the right drawer and she even like to put our shoes away. Even more odd for a 2 year old is that any food she drops or purposely throws (with the evil smirk of course) she wants to get on the floor right after and pick it up or point it out to us to pick up. Normally we would be thrilled with this behavior but we're concerned that this could be some weird coping mechanism to being adopted??? Whatever it is, I hope some healthy form of that behavior lasts! Bela still has 2-year old fits of rage and tantrums but it's kind of nice to know she hasa clean streak!?!

Today was full of a lot of first's with Bela and mommy though! She let me hold her while I fed her breakfast - she definintely is getting used to American foods. Daddy had to be nearby while I was feeding her but that was definintely a first where she sat on my lap for a change! She also reached out and grabbed my finger to walk toward the door for a few seconds. Hopefully, these are all progress signs of her beginning to attach with me...only time will tell of course. I know daddy is looking very forward to when Bela wants mommy to sleep with instead :)

Ryan the Wonder Dad!

Oh wow, so the first week was easy with Bela compared to the last night!! Not only are we severly jet-lagged, but I came down with the stomach flu and Ryan started to show symptoms last night. How we made it through India for 2 weeks without getting sick is amazing!  On top of all of that, Bela started to really fuss during dinner and sleep time. It got to the point where she would only sleep if she was sleeping on top of Ryan's chest, face down, thumb in mouth!  Gone are the days it seems of Bela just passing out, sleeping on our stomach with her butt stuck way up high, feet crossed with belly button just a finger away.

Now it's sleeping on daddy or no sleeping at all. So last night was really rough on Ryan as there was nothing I could do as she just wanted daddy. We are now "that" couple who sleeps in seperate rooms because of the baby!  Today however was not all that bad. I managed to distract Bela long enough so Ryan could take a nap - albeit he had to be next to her the whole time so she wouldn't throw a fit. She also let me feed her for lunch, but she had to sit on Ryan's lap to do it.  But that little smirk is so apparent - right before she throws her food, she gets that evil little look on her face. It's still so cute though and am just glad she is smirking. And while it seems so natural for us to want to correct her behavior, we have to remember that correction won't happen without connection. So for now, we need to appease her and comfort her until she is attached to us fully, at which point we can then start to correct her.

Ryan taught her a few words today. She is a Chatty Cathy with him but it mostly sounds like gibberish to us. She can point to what she wants so that helps with the communications. She did repeat the words: bubble and ducky and used the remote control to say Hello (as if it were a phone). We also discovered that while morning showers are very hard for her (she totally hates them), evening baths are not so bad. So we might just flip to that instead of bathing in the morning. She also discovered all of our pots and pans today while so grandpa is coming over tomorrow to batten down the hatches on our kitchen cabinets.  We're trying to introduce her to new foods and the good news is she likes pasta. Bad news is that we have to eat everything she doesn't like. Such as any soup with "floaties" - she pretty much just likes broth. She also loves bread but is not a fan of apple sauce! The trial and error process is not fun but hopefully we can figure out some key staple foods and stick with that.

I was also so thankful to talk to another local mom who adopted from India - she wrote a blog about her experience (which inspired me to start blogging). She reassured us that everything we are going through and all of Bela's reactions are so perfectly normal. There are so many things to be thankful for with Bela. For instance, I am just so thankful that she is eating and pooping - amazing how my happiness for her has been defined to life's simplicities. Let's hope Ryan and Bela sleep well tonight! 

Home At Last!

We are SO HAPPY to finally be home - one full day later than we originally expected due to all the flight delays in Delhi! Needless to say, it's been a very long few days. We got an amazing welcome home from our friends and family; we are so thankful and overwhelmed with all the love! My cousins and my brother's sister-in-law met us at the airport with big welcome home signs and balloons for Bela - it was so special and something that I can't wait to show her pictures of!

She also got to meet some of her new cousins. My sister made traditional Indian food for Bela and fed us - thank goodness as neither Ryan or I were going to cook (yes, with our role reversal it looks like I am going to have to learn a few basics!). 

When we got to our house, Ryan's parents and sister fully stocked our fridge and pantry with foods for Bela. The house was nicely decorated with welcome home signs and balloons all the way up to Bela's room. Bela is so loved!! Thank you Shyamal, Anita, Nilu, Jack, Sagar, Shareena, Alan, Pilar, Denise, Erika, Stephanie, Sonel, Jay, Mom, Dad, the One-Giving family and of course all of our nieces and nephews who were also very excited to welcome Bela home!

We noticed a little smirk that she gives when she is getting ready to do something bad. This picture on the right sums up her joy in playing at the airport where she wasn't supposed to. The plane ride home was really hard early on - especially for Ryan. That smirk quickly went away as we got on the plane. Bela started to throw a tantrum right before takeoff so Ryan locked himself in the airline bathroom with her and she eventually fell asleep just before the flight attendants insisted Ryan take his seat - whew! Tantrum 1 and counting! She threw her second tantrum when she woke up because she wanted a baby bottle that the child next to us was drinking out of. She hasn't drank out of a bottle for a while now, but the couple next to us were kind enough to give her a clean bottle for her to suck out of. Again it's normal for her to regress a bit from what we understand so we went with it! We won't have any bottles at home for her so we weren't worried about her getting attached to a bottle again - we just wanted to appease her through the flight so everyone around us could get some sleep! So the first 4 hours of the 16 hour flight was really tough with a total of 3 tantrums!!! Ryan was amazing and I was so impressed with how he handled everything. He spent a lot of time locked in the bathroom with her but that seemed to work so again, we went with it just to get through the flight! Welcome to the "terrific" 2's I guess! She still is totally stuck on Ryan and won't let anyone else hold her. Ryan is now an expert in changing diapers, even in the small airline bathrooms! We joke that his time has reduced from 45 minutes (the time it took him to change his first diaper in Pune) to about 10 min now for public bathrooms. He insists on fully unclothing her before a change because the first attempt was very messy. So for now, that's the process until she is fully potty trained.  Bela has been a great sleeper too once she is down so that has been great as it gives Ryan time to re-charge.

Since Ryan had his hands full with Bela, I think I've gotten a pretty good work out lifting and carrying all of our luggage the last 2 days through Delhi, Dubai and now at home. 6 bags and 3 heavy carry-on’s. Thank goodness my brother and his family were also traveling with us. Their help was awesome and our nephew got to spend some time with Bela on this journey. We certainly didn't expect this role reversal but then again, we really couldn't predict what would happen even with all the expert advice. At least she is home now and we can focus on her attachment with me. 

She Laughs!

Today, Bela really started to open up! While she is still completely attached to Ryan and won't even let me hold her unless I am bathing her, she actually started to open up quite a bit. She started throwing her toys and blocks off our hotel room bed and onto the floor while she was playing. While most parents would normally discipline their children for that, Ryan and I encouraged her to do it! We were so thrilled that our hotel room floor was covered in toys and blocks. Best of all, Bela helped to clean it all up after she was done - even pointing out blocks that had made their way under the desk that we hadn't noticed. We noticed that she likes things to be clean, in order and organized once she is done playing. It's kind of interesting seeing how many new personality traits we notice each day - there is an analyst in her for sure!

Now that we have Bela's paperwork done with the US Embassy. The plan was to do some shopping, sight-seeing and then make our way to the airport to get home. But we found out this morning that our flight tonight has been "rescheduled" from 4am to 1pm the following day! Delhi has had tons of "fog" the last few weeks resulting in major flight delays. What's funny is that it's actually smog that has been socked in by very cold weather and has caused near 0 visibility in the mornings. It's also much colder than I remember it ever being here - apparently they have been breaking many records like other parts of the world with severe cold temperatures.

So with the extra time, we visited yet another temple today. My mom wanted to visit Laxmi Temple; in Pune we visited the Ganpati Temple (“Please don’t feed my God peanuts to all of you Simpson’s fans”). My mom wanted to bless Bela again and our nephew Ayden. My brother's family and my Dad joined us in Delhi yesterday so Bela got to meet her uncle, aunt, grandpa and cousin for the first time. She doesn't react well to new people yet and pretty much clung to Ryan when they met her – she wouldn't let him go for anything. But today, was truly an awesome day for Bela and her getting more comfortable with us. During our car ride from the temple to the shopping district, Bela started to play in the car, waving at people and started to laugh. Ryan found a tickle spot on her neck and she started to laugh hysterically when he tickled her! We never heard her laugh like that before - we barely saw her crack a smile before today! What was totally cute was that she would lift up her shirt so Ryan could tickle her belly and she would laugh some more. I think Ryan was totally relieved that she showed some humor and started to laugh; I think he thought that she would have a stoic expression forever! :)

It's late here in India - Ryan and Bela are both sleeping heavily while I update this blog. Tomorrow we're going to make our second attempt to leave India. None of our travel delays have stressed out though as everything seems to work out just the way it needs to (i.e. or as my Mom would say - fate and Karma takes over). So with the flight delay, we spend another night in Dubai tomorrow, getting home a day later than expected. But with that, we can pick up Bela's bag that was stuck there before we arrived in India (saving us a ton of money to have it shipped). And who knows, maybe we wouldn't have seen Bela open up so much today if we were traveling on a plane like we had planned. My mom probably credits the temple visit for her opening up today but we're just thankful and so, so, so grateful for little Bela and how she has already added so much joy to our lives. Can’t wait to see what tomorrow brings in terms of us learning more about her personality!

Daddy's Little Girl

Since we arrived in Delhi, we've been on the go, non-stop. The first full day we had we spent most of the morning at the US Embassy getting Bela's immigration paperwork together. The package the embassy gave us weighs almost as much as she does! The good news is that her Visa and all other paperwork went very smoothly. The security here in Delhi is very, very strict. All cars are being searched before they enter major hotels (including ours) and the security to get into the US Embassy was even more strict. With India's independence day on the 26th of January, India is on heightened alert around all major sites and tourist areas here in the capitol. Bela has totally attached to Ryan. So much so that all I get to do is bathe her and get her ready in the morning - after that, she is totally clinging to Ryan. He has to feed her, put her down for naps, carry her as we go about town, the works! Needless to say, Ryan is going to need some really good massages when we get home!

Bela has done amazingly well considering she left everything and everyone she knew just 5 days ago! She is eating really well and is sleeping through the night. Her taste buds are continuously developing also - she tried chow mein (yes, in India) for the first time, had her first sandwich and even chowed-down potatoes wedges and her first hash brown. Ryan was thrilled that the has another potato fan in the family! Can we be this lucky! We are so thrilled and relieved that Bela has already started to attach to us (because that is such a critical part of her ability to feel secure. Bela even took her first flight from Pune to Delhi on Wednesday and she was a total gem - even with an ear infection. She enjoyed looking out the window when she wasn't sleeping during the flight. Bela has been pretty stoic up until now - not showing a whole lot of emotion except if Ryan leaves her sight -then she sobs like crazy and instantly is quiet once Ryan holds her again. Ryan and I were so excited that she yelled mama in her sleep - giving us a sign that she is capable of speaking. We know she can talk but she has been slow to speak with us. She has even regressed to requiring us to feed her even though she used to feed herself at the orphanage. All of this was somewhat expected given the trauma she has just experienced. But she surprised all of us in being so attached to Ryan - she is totally Daddy's little girl!!